With Apologies to “The Eagles”
Off an Ocean sprayed highway, sea salt wind in my hair
Must smell of academy, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw the the absence of light
My mind grew heavy and my sight went dim
I had to stop for the night
There they stood in the doorway;
Of their two Kingdom place
And I was thinking to myself
Was the Mosaic merit or was the Mosaic grace?
Then they took up their lecterns and they told me the way
There were voices from the corridors,
I thought I heard them say …
Welcome to Escondido California
Where Natural law’s place (Natural Law’s place)
Is in the left hand space (In the left hand space)
Plenty of room at Escondido California
Any time of year (Any time of year)
We’ll take your money here (Take your money here)
Their minds are hermeneutically twisted, they got the dualism bends
They’ve trained a lot of pretty, preacher boys whose thinking now ends
How they spin in the classroom, with exegetical dragnet
Some spin to remember, some spin to forget
So I called up the Porter
‘Please bring third law-wine’
He said, ‘We haven’t had that spirit here since Dr. Meredith Kline’
Still Reformed voices are calling regarding your stay
Wake you up in middle of the night
Saying, “Get far away!”
Welcome to Escondido California
Where Natural law’s place (Natural Law’s place)
Is in the left hand space (In the left hand space)
They’re changing it all at Escondido California
Now theocracy (Now Theocracy)
Is no more you see
Razors in their speaking
With Intrusion Ethic device
And they said ‘We are all just radicals here, giving well-paid advice’
And in the torture chambers,
They declare Mosaic Fatah
They stab it with their steely knives
But they just can’t kill God’s Law
Last thing I remember, I was
Countering their lore
I had to turn their worldview back
To the Calvin it was before
‘Relax,’ said the ordained man,
‘We are programmed to deceive.
You can argue anything you like
But we will never believe!’