If A Politically Correct Version of the Lord of the Rings Were Written Today

They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. With that in mind we are kind of imitating the great J. R. R. Tolkien in this piece imagining what the Middle Earth would have been like if his creativity had fallen into the hands of a Politically author.

1.) First it would be easy to imagine in a 21st century PC version of the “Lord of the Rings,” that Sauron and Saruman would have been much more subtle in their drive for conquest. Instead of invading they would have teamed up as International Financier Elitists and emigrated the Dweefsums into the Shire in order to conquer the Shire. Further, Saruman and Sauron would have appealed to the Hobbits altruism and convinced them that assimilating with the Dweefsums was the compassionate thing to do. Eventually Mayor Whitfoot of Hobbiton as well as the Thain of the Shire became convinced that this was good policy and placed in charge of the Orc Immigration process (OIP) Ted Sandyman and Lotho Sackville-Baggins. After some time, with the success of the OIP,  the schools of Hobbiton began to teach the Hobbiton children that mating with Dweefums was a noble thing to do.

Over the passage of time Merry and Pippin and Samwise pushed for the legalization of male mengae-a-trois relationships and they were finally Knighted when their long fought for legislation finally passed.

2.) With the passage of time, Denethor, by using the Palantír  (seeing stone) saw how hopeless his situation was and so convinced his ruling council that accommodation was the best course for Gondor and so embraced a “keep the Great Gate open” policy toward Minias Tirith and so was a open invitation to the citizens of Osgiliath.

3.) Eventually, the Rohirrim gave up their women folk preferring bestiality after a decades long study was published by a Dr. Alfred Kinsomer that confirmed that the Rohirrim were indeed closer to their horses than to their women.  Over the course of time a proper perspective of History was arrived at and so there was outlawed any celebrations of the Rohirrim’s victory at Helm’s Deep. Indeed a generation was raised up that tore down the monuments to Theoden gallantly fighting on Snowmane and of Eomer supporting his Uncle in Battle. What took their place was a monument to the Uruk-Hai instead, who – it turns out – were the real victims of the battle of Helm’s deep.

4.) Aragorn finally divorced Arwen Evenstar and married Farimer. Arwen finally gave into her Transgender Man soul and shacked up with her own Father Elrond. After Aragorn abdicated the throne the “Mouth of Sauron” took over the throne of Gondor and he, in turn, made the Nazgul his privy council.

5.)  Gondor families started adopting lovely little Easterlings and accused everybody else who was not doing the same of sinning. And with each adopted Easterling, Haradrim, and Umbarian the Churches in Gondor rang their bells and celebrated their nobility for being so caring.  Indeed, even when it was clear that the Easterling, Haradrim, and Umbarian adopted children were corrupting their own seed, it didn’t matter since the Easterlings, Haradrim and Umbarians were a missionary projects.

6.) The Gondorian Naval forces were disbanded when it was realized that the Pirates of Umbar were simply “misunderstood.” The leadership of Gondor came to realize that the Pirates of Umbar would instantly drop down their weapons once they would see the tolerant shores of Anfalas.

7.) Equality was finally arrived at in the West when the Pukel men were invited to intermarry with the women of Dale. Also, Elves and Dwarves began to have marital concourse so that a new race of Dwelfs was formed. The Dwelfs though were a insecure people never having a clear identity of who they were.
 8.) The Wizards were found out to be of a long ignoble line made of the limited quantity of something called “White Light.” These Wizards were created by the wicked Valor and so finally understood to be as wicked as Grima Wormtongue had once warned King Theoden about.  Wormtongue knew all of this all along! Oy vey, Wormtongue! You have always been our greatest ally!
 9.) Galadriel was the great great great Grandmother of Angela Merkle and like her illustrious great great great Granddaughter was a key link in finally inviting the natural enemies of the Elves to integrate into Lothlorien.

10.) Gollum was declared to be a great civil rights leader and a Middle Earth holiday was established in his honor, during which the utes of Gondor would celebrate his contributions to cultural diversity by pillaging and ransacking various Merchants of Gondor while playing a game called Out-Knock. Raw Fish was considered a delicacy among the Utes during this celebration.  Indeed, eventually a Statue was raised of Gollum in the Hobbiton city square. (The statue though was made by a woodelf and as such Gollum, in his statue, looked suspiciously like a wood elf.) Further, every city in the West, large or small, had a street named ‘Gollum Smeagol –The King,’ Street.

Later it would be discovered that “Doctor” Gollum Smeagol — The King,  had plagiarized large portions of his Ph.D. dissertation, as well as his iconic “I Have a Precious” speech, from the writings of several Elven academics and at least one River-folk preacher.  Also, later it was celebrated that Dr. Gollum Smeagol — The King, had also plagiarized large portions of his “Letter from a Wood-Elf jail” correspondence.

11.) Black Hearted Huorn Ents tried to fit into the ruling councils of men but, always needing a filibuster just to introduce themselves, they had long since gone, once again, looking for Entwives.

Hat Tip — Habakkuk Mucklewrath, Durand Gregory, Dunns Thomas,  Cherry Nathanson.


Luther’s Handling of Law vis-a-vis Calvin’s Handling of Law

According to Dr. George Lindbeck’s essay, “Martin Luther and the Rabbinic Mind,” Luther’s ‘controversial-theological’ writings emphasize that Christians must be free from the law. The Law in its usus civilis (‘lack of moral freedom’ vis-a-vis demands) is socially necessary but individually corrupting. This is so because it makes the individual more sinful by making them hypocritical. In its usus theologicus the law reveals sins and God’s terrifying accusations, but also reveals to the exposed sinners their need for salvation. Christ frees the Christian from this coercive and accusatory law. In the Lutheran catechisms, however, the Mosaic law is not called Lex or Gestez but ‘teaching.’ Here Luther praises the law as a complete guide for human life. It inculcates ‘fear, love, and trust in God in all things’ and thus tells us how all the other commandments are to be obeyed. Luther’s negative assessment of the law in his ‘controversial-theological’ also marks dispensationalism. Both tend to pit law and works against gospel and grace. Calvinism, by contrast emphasizes the third use of the law. In Calvin’s view the law is God’s gracious gift to His people in both dispensations, mirrors God’s moral nature, and points to the way of life. In Calvin’s view the usus pedagogicus is due to human depravity, not to weakness in the law in contrast to the gospel (John Calvin, Commentaries on the Epistle of Paul to the Romans … see also Institutes of the Christian Religion 2.7.4; 2.7.7). In Reformed theology (WCF 19) the moral Law codifies the eternal moral law, already known to Adam in conscience in earlier revelations. In this system of theology the law still is of ‘great use’ to believers and unbelievers because it ‘directs them to and binds them to walk accordingly … It is likewise of use to the regenerate, to restrain their corruptions.’ Reformed theology also distinguishes between the eternal moral law, the historically conditioned, judicial law for Israel’s courts and the typical ceremonial law for the house of God.

Bruce Waltke
An OT Theology — pg. 436 (Footnote #50)

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends … Mickey Henry; A Christian Apologetic For Open Carry During Church Worship Services

Mickey Henry is a non de plume of a personal friend of mine who was recently rebuffed by his Church “leadership” for daring to open carry in Church in a state where to do so is legal. This is a letter he wrote to his leadership after being told he may not open carry in his “conservative” Church. Try to keep in mind that there was a time in the history of our country when it was not uncommon for men to carry their weapons to Church. I think that Mickey’s letter is convincing.

——————

Dear Elder Donnie

Since concealed carry is encouraged, we share a lot of common ground concerning self-defense and the errors of pacifism. Suffice to say, armed defense of innocents is simply the application of the positive requirements of the Sixth Commandment. The crux of disagreement, then, is open vs. concealed. Here, in brief, are my arguments for open carry:

1. I am of the strong opinion that open carry acts as a deterrent to violence. Open carry is essentially a clear statement that acts of aggression will be met with strong resistance.

2. To Christ is given all authority; all earthly authority is thus derivative. Because we Christians confess Christ as Lord, submitting to His Law-Word, Christians have a unique responsibility to rule under Christ as His earthly vicegerents. We are, in fact, commanded to do so by the Dominion Mandate. Weapons and related imagery, such as swords, spears, maces, the fasces, halberds, etc., are the customary tokens by which power and authority are symbolized and commonly recognized (the instruments of the death penalty are identified with the authority to execute the death penalty). I open carry as a visible symbol of my submission to Christ’s Law-Word, and my willingness to use the authority He has given me to defend my family and other innocent life.

3. Just as the Gospel is made clear in the symbols and liturgy of the Church, there is a certain visible representation of the Law-Grace dynamic in the open carry of weapons by confessing Christians: grace and mercy to the innocent, justice for those who would transgress His Law.

4. The degenerate culture around us tolerates Christians only if we are weak and impotent. But we are to be standard bearers, a city on a hill, no matter the spirit of the age. I am glad that a number of the men at Redeemer do carry weapons, but open carry makes manifest that ours is a vital faith, and we will not cower or lower ourselves to the popular image of the ineffectual Christian man engendered by the enemies of God.

5. As to scaring away visitors, I humbly submit that this is an expression of the “attractive Gospel” theories of the Kellerite/New Calvinist movement, and is at odds with the historical understanding of Calvinism. A work of God’s grace on His elect is to overcome their sinful aversion to the practical outworking of His Law. Large families, homeschooling, modest dress, infant baptism, all male leadership, advocacy for traditional marriage – these things and others in open view at Redeemer are offensive to the broader culture and even to some of our brethren in other denominations, but we practice them as the people of our Lord and Savior, and depend on the sufficiency of His grace to reach those who visit us. Additionally, this being Texas, I have little doubt that at least some visitors would be attracted by a sign of such vitality.

I Get By With A Little Help From My Son …

“… Israel assumed that the messianic king would be a political ruler and world conqueror, so that it equated the Kingdom of God with an historical state, a greater and world-wide Rome, as it were. The idea of government was equated with the state. This equation was radically pagan. In pagan antiquity as today, the state was seen as a divine-human order, and as the over-all lord and sovereign. In such a view, all things have their being within the jurisdiction and only with the approval of the sovereign state. Religion, art, family, school, and all things else are departments of the state and cannot be allowed to exist in independence of it. The state thus usurps the over-lordship of God and becomes God on earth. No area of freedom can exist outside the state: freedom becomes a privilege granted by the state and subject to its conditions.

Christianity, by asserting the supreme lordship of Christ over Caesar and all other human institutions, reduced the state to its Biblical dimensions, as a ministry of justice (Rom. 13:1-6).”

R.J. Rushdoony; pg 70, IBL II.

I am writing this out of frustration in seeing many people view Donald Trump as the president that will make America great again. In truth, as per the quote above, we will not be able to reform or make America great again (if it ever was great) through the civil realm. In point of fact, when we look to that area of government to create reform and to restructure areas where they do not belong, we are engaging in not only a pagan thought, but a Talmudic pagan thought. I will call people’s attention to where Jesus told Peter, after he had struck the ear off the high priest’s servant, “those who live by the sword, die by the sword.” If Rushdoony is correct in the above passage, which I believe is obvious, then a proper understanding of this passage would be that those who look to the state, die by the state, as the state’s administrative role has always been the sword. If Peter was faulted for expecting our Lord Jesus Christ to be a political savior (for lack of a better term), how much more are Christians to be faulted for expecting reform to come from someone who believes or would use the civil realm to dominate every other sphere. Therefore, as Christians, we are not allowed, per God’s law and Christ’s command, to advocate, vote, or participate in any function that furthers the state being used or seen as political savior, for that would be burning incense to Caesar.

So what must we do then, as there is no candidate and will be no candidate that is running on a platform of removing civil government intrusion? Should we not participate in the civil government functions at all? Certainly not. I believe we should do as God has commanded and not only obey Him by tithing to a faithful repository of the Church, but tithing to a faithful repository of the civil government. And by this, I do not mean the taxes we pay to the usurpers in the civil government. (The method you used to prevent that thievery is something I will leave up to conscience.) However, we as God’s people are still required to tithe to a faithful civil government. If none is in existence, then we should set the money aside as sacred and holy to the Lord until the time we can form or find one. Yes, I am suggesting to do as God commands and, like Gideon, send all the hosts away so that there are only three hundred men remaining. It is not the horse or the strength of men that win the battle, but it is the strength of God, and He has given us set rules and commands, though they may seem small or insignificant, they are much more powerful than any false vote for a king.  God is the omnipotent ruler, and if we look for reform, we must look to Him and His laws, and first apply them in our lives so that people may say who is this and what God do they serve?

If the Scripture is not enough, we can look to history and see what the early Christians did by setting up their own courts, and their own judgment halls, and abiding by them, so in the end the political savior had to accept their dominance of that sphere or face internal destruction.

In summary, we should not let our emotions become entangled with any political savior who seeks to rescue us through the use of civil government. We should not consider the money stolen from us in taxes to be the tithe that the Lord has commanded us to give to the state. If we engage in either of these practices, we run the danger of facing the Deuteronomic curses. We should set aside money to a faithful civil government so that the Lord’s commands might be obeyed, and His promised blessings received. For God is the omnipotent sovereign, and though the nations conspire against Him and His people, He will laugh at them in scorn and run the threshing wheel over them, causing them to be chaff in the wind. As He has promised, so it will be.

Anthony McAtee

One of Obama’s 2016 State of the Union Whoppers

“We need to reject any politics that targets people because of race or religion This isn’t a matter of political correctness. It’s a matter of understanding what makes us strong. The world respects us not just for our arsenal; it respects us for our diversity and our openness and the way we respect every faith. His Holiness, Pope Francis, told this body from the very spot I stand tonight that ‘to imitate the hatred and violence of tyrants and murderers is the best way to take their place.’ When politicians insult Muslims, whether abroad or our fellow citizens, when a mosque is vandalized, or a kid is called names, that doesn’t make us safer. That’s not telling it like it is. It’s just wrong. It diminishes us in the eyes of the world. It makes it harder to achieve our goals. And it betrays who we are as a country.”

Barack Hussein Obama
State of the Union — 2016

1.) This is just another way of saying we need to reject profiling. It continues with the fantasy that communicates that looking at the law of averages is a sin and so makes one a not nice person. As an example, where is the error in thinking that if bald people commit a disproportionate amount of crime as compared to their demographic presence then bald people should be targeted and the fact that there are bald people who are nice doesn’t change the necessity to target bald people one iota. If it is a known fact that bald people, when taken as a whole, tend to strap on explosive vests and blow people up then bald people need to be targeted. If it is known that bald people, taken as a whole, don’t understand that rape is not perfectly acceptable than bald people need to be targeted even if there were some bald people who would strenuously object to fellow baldies strapping on explosive vests and going on rape binges.

When the President says these kinds of things we need to just say that ‘we have a fool for a President.’ It wouldn’t be the first time that a fool has been President. Honestly, one can’t help but wonder if the reason he says these kind of things is because he belongs to a demographic that, when taken as a whole, does need to be targeted.

 2.) We do not respect every faith. There is absolutely zero respect for any faith that says that we should not respect every faith. There is zero respect for any faith that says that it alone is the only true faith and that all other men need to repent. There is zero respect for any faith that insists that it alone should be the foundation upon which all social orders should be based.  There is zero respect for Christianity because Christianity makes all those truth claims.

3.) Diversity is most definitely not a strength. How can the fact that different faith systems that contradict one another as present in the same nation be considered a strength? Diversity is only a strength when all the diverse elements — all the diverse talents and abilities — share a common faith, a common theology, and a common culture. Any other diversity is a recipe for disaster. It is homogeneity in faith, theology, culture and ethnicity that makes for strength. Obama is selling the lie here of multiculturalism.

4.) Obama is embracing here the politics that target people because of their religion that disagrees with him. He is insulting those who disagree with him by suggesting that unless they do as he says and so follow his religion of multiculturalism they are imitating the hatred and violence of tyrants and murderers. Et tu Obama?

While one might argue that Mosques should not be vandalized one can still insists that Mosques do not belong in lands that were settled by Christians and that Mosques should be swept off American soil.

5.) In this post I am merely channeling an older understanding of America.

“The real object of the [First] amendment was not to countenance, much less to advance, Mahommetanism, or Judaism, or infidelity, by prostrating Christianity, but to exclude all rivalry among Christian sects, and to prevent any national ecclesiastical establishment which should give to a hierarchy the exclusive patronage of the national government.”

~ Joseph Story,
Associate Justice —  Supreme Court of the United States from 1811 to 1845

The only diversity that was ever envisioned for America was the diversity of different denominational expressions of Christianity as those denominations resided in States that could decide for themselves on what denominational expression of Christianity might or might not be the established religion for that State.