Welcome To Moron University

My oldest daughter is attending the area Community College in order to get her general education requirements out of the way at a very inexpensive price. The ‘educators’ in this place are a hoot and as such she has already had her share of brain dead professional teachers. Now Laura Jane is far far more polite and far far less prickly than her curmudgeon Patriarch but already Laura Jane has had to defend the Old South. She has had to defend the 6th commandment. She has had to defend originalist understandings of the Constitution and much more. Last year Laura Jane went from failing a writing class for her essay on ‘The Problems of Contemporary Churches’ to getting an ‘A’ in the class upon appeal. You see the initial ‘F,’ ironically enough, was for the superior writing quality that clearly expressed the vacuity of the Contemporary Church scene and so convicted the Proffessors on the essay grading committee that were attending area Contemporary ‘Churches.’

The latest brain dead outrage happened this week in her ‘History’ class. The Professor said in class in context of the Scopes Monkey Trial,

“Now I am not trying to convince anybody of anything. I don’t care what you believe in terms of your religion. But I do have to tell you that it is just a fact that the Bible can’t stand up in a court of law. You see the Bible is full of contradictions and that is just the way it is.”

Oh, no … he’s not trying to convince anybody of anything. What a Dunderhead. What a Poltroon. What an Idiot.

Now children, I don’t care what you believe as long as you understand that if you are a Christian you are believing something that no court in the World would ever accept as reasonable or provable. You children can believe whatever you want to believe as long as you’re willing to accept that your belief system is unbelievable by legally recognized methods of acceptance. Go ahead children and believe stupid things and see if I care.

But this isn’t the end. No sirreee Bob. You see, later that week her brain dead math teacher believed that he had to try and one up his brain dead History teacher colleague. The Math teacher said,

“Math is basically made up and it is just by chance that it works out in the world. Most of the people who are writing their Doctorates now in Math are just making it up.”

Math is just made up? 2+2 = 4 only equals 4 because everybody decided and agreed that it would equal 4, and ‘Wow isn’t it fortunate that it ended up working out in the world’?

Not to be outdone the Chemistry teacher this week chimed in with,

“There is more intelligent life out there and the gasses that we are releasing in the atmosphere will notify the intelligent life that is out there that we are here.”

This guy has been watching way to much Star Trek for his own good.

Look, I’m a patient man. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt as much as possible and try to hear what people are saying with a generous amount of charity but this is beyond the pale.

In case anybody wants to know why American children are stupid, I offer these three pieces of evidence that the reason that our children are so stupid is that their teachers are brain dead troglodytes.

And, ‘no’ I don’t think Laura Jane’s school is some kind of notorious exception to the rule.

Author: jetbrane

I am a Pastor of a small Church in Mid-Michigan who delights in my family, my congregation and my calling. I am postmillennial in my eschatology. Paedo-Calvinist Covenantal in my Christianity Reformed in my Soteriology Presuppositional in my apologetics Familialist in my family theology Agrarian in my regional community social order belief Christianity creates culture and so Christendom in my national social order belief Mythic-Poetic / Grammatical Historical in my Hermeneutic Pre-modern, Medieval, & Feudal before Enlightenment, modernity, & postmodern Reconstructionist / Theonomic in my Worldview One part paleo-conservative / one part micro Libertarian in my politics Systematic and Biblical theology need one another but Systematics has pride of place Some of my favorite authors, Augustine, Turretin, Calvin, Tolkien, Chesterton, Nock, Tozer, Dabney, Bavinck, Wodehouse, Rushdoony, Bahnsen, Schaeffer, C. Van Til, H. Van Til, G. H. Clark, C. Dawson, H. Berman, R. Nash, C. G. Singer, R. Kipling, G. North, J. Edwards, S. Foote, F. Hayek, O. Guiness, J. Witte, M. Rothbard, Clyde Wilson, Mencken, Lasch, Postman, Gatto, T. Boston, Thomas Brooks, Terry Brooks, C. Hodge, J. Calhoun, Llyod-Jones, T. Sowell, A. McClaren, M. Muggeridge, C. F. H. Henry, F. Swarz, M. Henry, G. Marten, P. Schaff, T. S. Elliott, K. Van Hoozer, K. Gentry, etc. My passion is to write in such a way that the Lord Christ might be pleased. It is my hope that people will be challenged to reconsider what are considered the givens of the current culture. Your biggest help to me dear reader will be to often remind me that God is Sovereign and that all that is, is because it pleases him. View all posts by jetbrane